Slinky Cat is also useful

Who knew you were a lap cat?
A settle down like that cat?
Tail tucked round your face cat,
You’ve found your comfy place cat.
Soft like sable fur cat,
The loudest, longest purr cat.
A kind of scrunched up ball cat –
The warmest of them all cat
Stave off the winter chills cat.
Save on those winter bills cat.
I love you such a lot cat.
You’re the best blanket that I’ve got cat.


Coughs and sneezes

Usually at night-time
it’s dinner for two and
please pass the wine
but tonight
I’m sneezey,
not able to breathe easy.
Cold then hot,
coughing a lot,
can’t get comfy in my skin
waiting for sniffling to begin.
Got runny nose issues,
so this evening,
may I have a Lemsip and
please pass the tissues….


Brush a while
minty aquafresh style,
going that extra mile for
gleaming teeth.
That winning smile
could bring world peace,
no more grief,
offer poverty relief.
Stop killings, pain.
Simply brush again,
and strike your
happy pose –
the unwashed become clothed,
corruption exposed.
The world as one,
with one flash of your pearly whites,
sharing ideas, delights.
and no more wars, fights.
All life would be alright.

If only toothpaste could stick
things together.

Rugby and it’s going wrong

I’m drinking wine and
watching the rugby.

You fucked up
and I’m getting fucked up
it is what it is today.
We were what we were.
We are what we are.
And there’s too little to say –
so much anger,
white hot and quick
to burn readily.
You’re winning.
The try is yours today.

I’m five glasses in and
I’ll decide tomorrow
if we’ll see another day.

Welcome to
your game play.

Now try and turn me.

to your life this way.

Too many photos

A thousand pictures
Of beaches and seas,
But within all those photos
Just two good ones of me.

Two where I’m not squinting,
Or pulling a face,
Or my clothes aren’t dishevelled
And hair out of place.

Two where I look happy
And reasonable well,
Not like I’ve just come
From the dark depths of hell.

Two where I look normal
And really quite sane,
(Though I am hard to see
Through the wind and the rain).

Two where I look fine and
Not bonkers at all –
The only two pictures that
Will hang on our wall…

And that’s one of the reasons
I love you so much.
You’re a whizz with photoshop,
And a quick retouch…